Monday, November 3, 2008

Cultural Cringe

Jessica Mauboy can be proud in the knowledge that her new hit single 'Running Back feat. Flo Rida' is Kyle Sandilands' fave tune of the moment, even if it isn't Flo Rida's. (Source: The Kyle & Jackie O Show, 'Have Breakfast With the Stars!')

Flo Rida's contribution to the track was clearly recorded in a booth somewhere in America, and although the press around the single makes a big deal about him shooting the clip in Melbourne earlier this year, he and Jess are never in the same shot.

Fortunately, the Battered Wife Syndrome narrative of the song neatly allows for his absence and her continued pining- “I keep comin' back (I keep runnin' back) And I keep runnin' back (I keep comin' back) And I keep comin, I keep runnin' back”, etc.

Flo Rida's rap is pretty interesting. He complains that girls are SO ANNOYING cos they have no self-respect, they're always wanting to take the guy back and give the relationship another chance, even if he's been cheatin'.

The video features Jess crooning on a balcony, and Flo shuffling around alone in a sparse hotel room, spliced back-to-back in a way that probably nurses Jess's delusion that she's, like, going out with him or something, while he's all “she can't...move...on”.

And she hasn't. Flo Rida is number 1 in Jess's Top Friends on MySpace (Jess is nowhere to be seen in his) and her bio employs one of the most embarrassing tactics ever, from the same journalistic family as NW's “A source close to the couple says...”

Here's what a source close to Jessica Mauboy has to say on how much Flo Rida likes Jessica Mauboy:
When today's hottest rapper is lost for words on hearing a new soulstress, she must be a future superstar. But it's an even bigger deal if that divette is Australian.

Flo Rida was stunned by Jessica Mauboy's crunk 'n' B hit 'Running Back'. "He couldn't believe it," Mauboy relates with a bashful laugh. "He was just like, 'What! She's an Australian artist? Where is she? What is she doing? Is she bringing out an album?' He was basically asking all the questions. He was really keen to know."


Anyway, don't worry Jess, STAY STRONG, you'll find someone else! Not only were you were a total doll on Idol, but you've gotten heaps skinny, AND you don't have dandruff!

10 comments:

Ezzy said...

Interesting how Flo Rida (just quietly WORST rap name ever) has ripped off lil Wayne's flow and characteristic intonations in this track. I guess apple bottom jeans don't really cut it anymore...

But WELL DONE Jessica. How far you've come since the Young Divas days. Although, I kind of wish it was Kate DeAraugo instead - her and Flo would be a totes hot couple.

Michaella said...

this is a really funny post sopho well done, WELL DONE

And ez, hilarious suggestion I think DeAraugo and he would be totes perfect togeths

sophie said...

DeArWHO???

Ez, I was thinking he was totally aping Lil' Wayne too, but because I'm not in Hoops I didn't really know and was too scared to say. So thanks for your stamp of approvlol!

And lol about his lame-o name, can you imagine how thrilled he was when he came up with it?! "So i'm from Florida... and I rap, so i've got great FLO.... and there's beaches in Florida, so I could possibly be RIDING that FLO... O...M....G....."

And thanks MICHAELLA for your kind words on not one but TWO BLOGS!

radge said...

true story: snob scrilla wrote flo ridas bit on this song

radge said...

he also has a funny story to tell about the ordeal. ask him sometime

nina said...

Snob Scrilla is my boy.

Shag said...

Remember when Akon wasn't huge, and appeared on a track with Savage?

nina said...

And Hamish and Andy were dropped from channel seven, and Heath Ledger NEVER made NIDA.

sophie said...

Or when I went to a p!nk concert in year 8 at Fox Studios?

snob-zilla said...

ok just for the record i sooooooooooooooo did not write Flo-rida's bit for this song...

Worst shite ever from this collab reliant swagger jacker who sounds on this track like he just got punched in the mouth....really hard....

I wrote everything else though...

am i happy about it...meh...it went gold...and that means i don't have to put a tie on for a loooooooong time...and I'd rather write stupid pop than sell foxtel in westfield...which i have done

meanwhile Nina you're my girl and I'm assuming the deleted comment was someone dissing me due to your statement...

well...

Piss Off already MisterMooseMan!!!!!